- hey whats up .. well ive got tons to say and talk about so yeah .. well you know how you think things are going to work out but then you realize they never will .. well i thought that everything was perfect this time with brandon but i guess i thought wrong .. i thought everything would go back to normal .. but then like things happened this wkn and then he went back to kammeron .. alot of stuff happened and now im so depressed .. upset .. sad . angry at myself .. everything in general.. u know i heard this sayn .. its not worth being with a guy if all they do is make you cry .. seriously ive been so depressed lately i dont know what to do .. i just wish that brandon would tell me straight up .. not holding nothing back .. tell me how he felt and what he wanted .. i cant sit here and wait around for him bc i feel like im his "rebound" girl .. and mess i dont know .. its like when kammeron gest mad at him he comes to me .. same way .. its weird and i cant put myself back through that .. i dont know why i love him so much .. i just dont .. i have so many strong feelings for him but i know he dont feel the same way but i wished he did .. i just dont know what to do .. i wish he would just tell me if he wanted to be with kammeron or what ... seriously .. tiffany told me not to "communicate" with him but thats soo hard .. it was soo hard that i just deleted his number outta my phone so i cant and i wont be able too .. it hurts soo bad .. i wrote him a note today .. and if even at least cared a little bit he would have came and talked to me or at least beeped me or something here .. and you know whats going to hurt soo much is if he doesnt even talk to me on my birthday its next wednesday .. oct. 6 .. and thats really going to hurt my feelings big time .. i dont know how someone can just forget 9 mths of something .. just like that .. he told me like 3 wks ago when we were fussin bc i was going to leave him and mess and never look back and he was like how can she forget 9 mths of something just like that bc ive tried and i cant .. ok it shows that he can .. it hurts to see him with kammeron bc what does she got that i dont .. a CAR ? seriously .. bc i mean dang .. thats just low how you have to go back and forworth playn with 2 girls minds at the same time and mess you know .. its crazy .. but i gotta go but i love you and ill write more tonight =)
<33 always cbk ..
brh- i love you and i always will no matter what ..
